Human Desires

Friday Feb 20, 2015 - BY Stacey


Sex. Sex. Sex.

It is not a dirty word, nor is having sex a dirty action. It is a very human drive that we all have and it is not something that we should let any religion or institution either repress or give us cause to feel shame.

I am fortunate to live in a time and place, whereby, as a female, I can write about carnal activities and am proud to admit that I have experienced lots of it. For me, being intimate with men was often for reasons other than for pure pleasure –for one thing, it helped validate me when I felt insecure. But I’m not here to give a laundry list about my actions, I’m merely filled with gratitude that I live in a society that doesn’t condemn me for being a human being with healthy, normal needs and desires.

But in many other parts of the world, that natural human desire is not only repressed but people, particularly females, risk being killed for expressing and acting out on them.

The New York Times front page article talking about the radicalization of a very handsome young man from Cairo, discusses the “increasingly conservative thinking that defines Muslims today, or sexual repression among young people who are taught that their physical and emotional desires can bring them eternal damnation.” The subject of the article was a bodybuilder who charmed and slept with many women. As he became more and more religious when he failed to secure a job, his biggest regret was about his relations with women. He found a preacher who told him: “Suppose a young man falls in love with a girl in college. He doesn’t touch her or talk to her or send her messages. He doesn’t even look at her. That’s still zina! (Here he used an Arabic term for the sin of adultery and fornication.)” This man found himself becoming a jihadist, whereby it’s a sin to have sex before marriage but not to slaughter and behead others for their religious differences.

I’m not blaming sexual repression for all the violence in the world, but for this man, it was easier to have his life in black and white terms – all or nothing. How sad that he chose killing for his “cause” over temporary unemployment and sexual and emotional pleasure.

Thank God the urge to kill, for most humans, is not acted upon. And thank God, the urge to have sex, for most of us, is considered a healthy and natural act.

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